I apologize in advance if this seems remarkably self-indulgent.  On the other hand, it’s a personal blog–I’m allowed to vent here!

I preface this with the following statement:  I love my job!  There are good days and bad days, as there are with anyone doing anything.  But my good days far outnumber the bad ones, and even on the worst, I still enjoy what I do.  But man, things really suck right now. 

I manage and maintain a little less than 600 computers on our campus, almost single-handedly.  That any of them work at all right now is incredible.  I am professionally ashamed of the house of cards that is the foundation on which nearly everything "works" and relies.  What was once a decent, robust, and streamlined system is now showing the signs of far-too-long a period of "just-in-time" management by yours truly.  If my System were a body, it’s suffering from a multitude of paper cuts to which I keep applying band-aids.  Eventually I need to do major surgery, but I have no idea when.

I need at least a week of uninterrupted time in a dark room with headphones on, no phones, and no people.  A week might do it.  Maybe more.  But I can’t even manage to take a "vacation," so when the hell is a week’s worth of system surgery supposed to happen?  Who will keep up with the band aids in the E.R. while I’m elbows-deep in viscera?

Nobody.  That person doesn’t work here.  There is no one with nothing to do, no one with room on their plate.

And I’m exhausted.